Sunday, October 12, 2008

The day of fasting 2008

I fasted on Yom Kippur. That was Thursday, and now it is Sunday and I'm still feeling the effects of a day of being empty. I hadn't realized until that day, how much stuff I give myself every day! Almost anything I want. On Yom Kippur, I didn't give myself anything tangible.

When I walked to the park, I only took my 2 keys. That was it! No wallet, no food, no water, no nothin'*, as they say in lovely bklyn. When I sat in the grass, I felt really different. I wasn't thinking about meeting anyone, or what café I would go to get lunch, or that I needed to accomplish anything, anywhere. There was only grass, clover, sun, and a few other people, some empty like me, lying in the park like little blankets of energy. Usually there is a thicker layer (stuff) between myself and nature. By taking away the distraction and desire of STUFF, that layer felt transparent.

A few weeks ago when we were working on a project, my friend Gil said that "art doesn't get made on a full stomach." I was hungry and didn't really want to hear that at the time, but we got our stuff done, and then we ate and it was delicious.

It's been a while since I've allowed myself to be empty enough to make art. I'm not just talking about food, but all the other stuff I've piled on so that it's hard to move. This year, I am going to try to be patient with emptiness. In yoga, or pranamaya, the exercise would be to focus on the exhale, rather than the inhale.

*this picture is from before, I didn't bring my camera!

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